Umm, I love to eat tasty foods that I didn’t cook. Even better when it comes with a cocktail and a table full of friends. Which is a long winded way of saying that I like to eat at awesome restaurants in big and small groups.

The one drawback is splitting the check. You need to bring cash or try to figure out how to divide it among credit cards (and annoy the wait staff). Most of the time this all goes off without a hitch.

But once in a blue moon someone doesn’t pay enough. Everyone looks at the bill, does the mental math then tosses in some cash. The last person–or, really, the group mom–counts the pile to make sure you have sufficient funds to pay the tab and cover a nice tip to boot.

It’s always a bummer when it’s short. Especially when you know you paid enough. Who didn’t pay a fair share? This paper fortune teller knows.

Download this PDF, print, fold and unmask the culprit.

Have you noticed how many people desperately strive for snobbery these days?

Umm, most of the people on Real Housewives. Especially the ones pretending to be rich when they’re actually on the verge of bankruptcy. The Kardashians. I mean, I don’t even know what else they’re famous for, but maybe that’s because I’m old.

It used to be that you bristled when someone suggested you might be a snob. But some of these reality TV aspirations seem to be spilling over into real life.

There’s definitely a contingent that wants the trappings of snobbery if not the title. So I made you this cootie catcher to help sort out the snobs from the wannabees.

Download this PDF, print, fold and find out your snob rating. Or give this to a likely candidate.

Sadly, money doesn’t grow on trees. And this reality means that we’re often cautious before making a big move because of the money question.

Will my business idea make money? What if I buy this rental property? Or start raising alpacas to sell the fur?

There’s an endless number of scenarios you might be pondering. But we’re guessing this one question might be hanging you up: Will you make money?

Wonder no more. Think of this cootie catcher as a business adviser light.

Download this PDF, print, fold and find your fortune.

We all hope to retire sooner rather than later, but thinking about all the details — like how we’ll afford it — ranks right up there on the fun scale with scrubbing the toilet.

Still, we like to daydream about days on the beach. Or maybe trips to Italy. Or, heck, just NOT waking up to an alarm clock. Look into your retirement future with this mystical paper fortune teller.

Download this PDF, print, fold and find out how long you’ll have to work.

I know, I know. What does that beach picture have to do with the lottery? Well, it’s the sunset on Hanalei Bay in Hawaii where I’m going to buy a house WHEN I win the lottery.

Actually, I’m convinced my cat knows the winning lottery numbers but since he can’t talk, he has no way of giving them to me. So to help me — and you — out of this conundrum, I created this lucky, lucky, lotto number cootie catcher.

It spits out one number each time you play until you have enough numbers to fill out your whole ticket. (OK, sometimes you have to do a little math.)

Download this PDF, print, fold and go win millions.

The problem with most financial planners is that they’re geared toward people who already have money. But what if you’re searching under the car seats to buy French fries at lunch? You deserve money advice, too.

We’re here to level the playing field with this printable paper fortune teller. It’s full of creative financial ideas for the not rich and not famous.

Download this PDF, print, fold and shore up your finances.

No. 32: The Financial Planning Cootie Catcher